Still here....my head's just been spinning from things going on.....mostly from trying to accomplish our normal routines (what's become our normal) while battling a nasty virus that's raced through the house, taking over sanity for 2 weeks, and for some of us, more than once. Bleccch.
Meanwhile...I know a lot of my kids have previous parents and relatives that read the blog and love the updates and information....here are some updates then. Hopefully, this will help catch some things up a bit and I can continue sharing from there....
Heather - missed 2hrs too much school during Erica's transplants. She had to be dropped from her nursing program until the next entry session, delaying her graduation by 4mos. She's very discouraged about that. The kids are all doing great!
Erica - discharged from the hospital today! She's glad to be home, but still on a lot of pain medications, has her JP tubes still in, wound healing is going slow. She has an IV, PICC line and a home health nurse. Trying to be excited about a walker and portable commode. Slow going - but she is finally out of what she'd started to feel was "hospital prison".
Caroline - discouraged over being denied for the Russia language teaching program she'd hoped for. The program teaches English to Russian children and will not accept anyone with ANY accent at all. Caroline still has a lovely lilting Russian accent, but not strong at all. Nonetheless, it was too much for their program. She's working many hours, bought her first car (in advance of getting her license - she is funny), and planning to start college in the spring.
Angelique and the girls (Alexis, 4, and Ammeri, 2) are staying with us for a few months. She's been a huge help already in keeping calm, structure and "normal" around the house. The girls are delightful. The 2 youngest of the 4 kiddos we had last spring also came with her - it's been a lot of fun for all of us to have Mayra and Jr. back (they are 4 and 3) - they blended right in as if they'd never been gone. Four preschoolers again is busy, messy and funny.
Vito - still here with us for at least another semester - starting more college classes tomorrow...
Bethany moved out in May. She moved again last week when she got a job that is just ideal for Bethany! She's a live-in nanny for a family with triplet infants.
Kate. Oh my Kate. Breaks my heart. She moved out a bit ago. At first, she maintained some contact. Now, there is none. She is making her own choices and I'm sure she will learn as she goes. Meanwhile, few are choices I would have wanted for either her or the baby. Some I just don't care for; others are really harmful choices. I hope she somehow knows how much we love her!!
Mari turned 18 and moved out. She lives with a family that is really nice and is making choices that, unlike some other sisters, surprise me with how positive they are! She stayed in school to finish her senior year, in spite of big barriers in transportation, location, and schedules. She is taking initiative to work on her credit problems, on her health and dental needs, and sports. Goes to church, keeps close contact with all of us and visits really often.
Ryan turned 18. He moved from Erica's home to a friend's home and about to move into his dorm room and start college.
Max is about to turn 18 and, at dinner today, claimed he attended every class during the first 5 days of school last week. I laughed and told him there is no reason to lie to me anymore - he's not even in my custody. 5 full days of doing what he's supposed to do? IF he went to every class, I can sadly place a large monetary bet (such as "millions") that he was pulling some big tricks in other areas of his life! Claims the GED program "didn't work out and now I'm looking into Job Corp". He follows me around during visits, clearly wanting mom attention (and getting it) - interesting change for him!
Elena is still doing great with her pregnancy. Has some slight anemia, but everything else is great. She really wants a high school diploma and not a GED, so she is enrolling in an online high school and hopes to do high school that way.
Helen. Tonight I told her that she no longer is required to have anything to do with me or with the family. This came after 2 weeks of hell with her, just tryiing to get her to hold to an agreement she'd already met - 15min with me every other week. Sunday dinner with family. She is truly filled with hate and can't do it - lies, sneaks, game plays, and then verbally exploded in a scary way during the meal. She can only be happier if I let her out. She'll be 18 soon and will refuse us then anyway. Now, she has to check in with Steve on a few things. Otherwise, she has her apartment, job, school and, most of all, her freedom from a family. I cried. She laughed at that.
Abigail went to TX for the summer and is also doing an online highschool program. New medications did not cause the seizures to return - but have transformed her into a lovely child. It's been GREAT to see the incredible changes.
Becca starts another year at the art school next week. I still love that she's there and wish more of my kids were arts-inclined so I could send them there also. She sang for us tonight for quite a while (Ryan played the piano) and it was great to hear their talents!
Steven and Angelica are the only kids at the main high school this year. Two years ago, I had 12 children there. Life has changed soooo much for us in such a short time.
Megan and Sarah are doing online/homeschool thru a modified virtual academy program. Nikki is in a life skills program at a school different from everyone else and loves it.
Nicole, Vonetta, Ashley, Allie and Larry attend the same school and have been attending a week already (with a day off this week already?) - I still love uniforms.
Larry goes to the nurse to use the restroom and we are working on other modifications. He gets frustrated at his lack of mobility, but doesn't seem to realize that this is why he's frustrated, so it often comes out in other tantrums. One arm is still in a "cage". We loosen it once each hour to exercise his elbow/arm. The elbow bends - but he can't make it bend, neither by moving it up nor down. The other arm is nearly back to normal. Time will tell what he's able to do with the right arm though....
Steve works a lot of hours and comes to help a bit when he's not working. He goes to church with us on Sundays.
I want to be back together and raising a family together. He's not interested in that at all. So, I go between wanting and trying.....and realizing that it's not going to happen. There are some strange things that are hard about the single parenting. I'm okay with the workload. I have some freedom in making sole choices about what we will do for the day. But I don't have another adult who knows the children, someone to bounce ideas and feelings off when the kids are being particularly trying - to help keep perspective and tell me that she/he is really being a pain and it's not just me...or the opposite. Sometimes, that is the hardest part....gets overwhelming trying to be emotionally strong enough for everyone and never a break from that. Most days it's not that bad....yesterday was, though. Tough day for me. But, tough or not, it doesn't change that this is now my life - single mom. Doesn't seem I have power to alter that. I need to find ways to make it work. So, perhaps I shall ask some single moms how they are able to handle that part.....
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Larry's talking with his birth mom here. I'm so glad we have the kind of relationship and situation that allows the kids (and her) to have phone calls and visits. (This photo is from a long time ago - before his arms were hurt, obviously. But they still have calls and visits...just last Sunday, visited for Christmas time...)
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